Tuesday, November 27, 2012

A Tale of Black Beards' Virginity

aaaaah yes simple time for simple people.not as simple as the glory days of my youth.these days would consist of me drinking Blackbeards Virginity (50% Rum, 25% Chuck Norris Tears, 15% Whale Ambergris, and 10%..GUN). I would nurse upon this beverage out of the hollowed out head of DJ Pauly D with a silly straw. After consuming this I would become a moderate comfortable tipsy, which would make any other man's heart implode in a milisecond if he were to sip it. Upon reaching tipsiness i go on my crusade around the globe. Citizens of every country and continent flee as if Godzilla is attacking there meek city, coincidently Godzilla is fleeing as well. They're not running in fear of destruction, but fear of being too impressed by the meer sight of me would make any woman climax till her vagina would smash into smithereens from pure ecstacy. After my crusade is done I go have another BlackBeards Virginity on my veranda in Sparta alongside with Mr.T,and Animal from the Muppets.

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